Seriously, Taylor Swift won Female Vocalist of the Year?!?!  That girl couldn't hit a note if it were a dead turtle and she had an inflatable, novelty baseball bat.  I would've been okay with any of the rest of them winning even though Miranda Lambert kinda bugs me and I'm really sick of Carrie Underwood and her whorey too-short-dress, legs apart, Shania Twain stance.  But, SERIOUSLY?! Taylor Swift over REBA?!  Do the same people vote for the CMAs as fix the Superbowl for Pittsburgh?

For saying what we're all thinking: I SERIOUSLY want to kick that kid's ass after the "balloon" stunt today.  I had to sit through an hour and a half of "Breaking News" watching that goddamn balloon while waiting for soaps that I NEVER GOT TO SEE because my local news is STUPID.  And I spent the whole time going, "How did the balloon get loose if the kid's INSIDE?"  And what did the parents say after they wasted my afternoon; wasted the resources of 5 local news stations (yes, FIVE), at least two sheriff's departments and countless firefighters, paramedics and police officers; had all northbound departures canceled out of DIA for 25 minutes; and the efforts of a $4000 an hour Blackhawk helicopter?  "We don't ground our children.  But I will be TALKING to him."  Oooo....I bet he's scared now.  He'll probably have to go hide in the attic for another 5 hours to console himself.  I think this is the first time I've hated Fort Collins more than I've hated Boulder.  DIE, FORT COLLINS HIPPIE, DIE!!

God, I need a Cartman icon.

P.S. Why am I never here for actual news? I'm gone when half the state burns down, the stock market crashes, and they find Osama's buddy Whatshisface Zazi a mile and a half from my house, but here for crap like this.  W.T.F.?

( And, I almost forgot... )

How's Jay Cutler workin' out for you, again?  Bwahahahaha!!!  5-0, suckas! 

Also, Dear Boomer Esiason,
You suck. Yes, the Broncos are for real.  And yes, everyone knows you'd gladly be on your knees for Tom Brady, so...STFU.

Sincerely,
me

So, my mom and I were mocking all the 50-year-old men on Match.com who want some 25 year old to bear their children when we came across a 29-year-old guy who sounded exactly like me.  My mom decided I should date him so she made me a profile.  In the 22 hours it's been up, I've had 3 emails, 5 winks, and 1 IM.  So, those ladies actually *looking* for a guy...apparently saying you hate shopping and love football is a real attention getter.  Just FYI.  Though, apparently all of them think I'm just kidding when I say I don't want kids.  But, um, seriously...I DON'T WANT KIDS.

I saw my brother for the first time in about 2 months yesterday, and I think he got a personality transplant.  He was all...nice and easy-going and stuff.  And he barely swore (not that I have anything against swearing, I'm actually a big fan, but for reals you need like a special decoder ring to decipher his meaning between all the "fucks") and said "thank you" lots of times.  It was WEIRD.  Granted, he was supposed to come get the rest of his shit out of the house today and it's already 2, so I guess we'll see how complete the transplant is.  Maybe he didn't take his anti-rejection drugs.

Why do charities make it so damn hard to donate stuff?  Hello, I have a bunch of crap to donate, could you pick up your damn phone?! FTLOG.

I'm totally diggin' One Life to Live.  At least one soap understands that supercouples are super for a reason and not supercouples are not. Like, duh.

ETA: Make that 8 winks, and 4 IMs.  WTF?

( The Good )
( The Bad )

In any case, I'm sure I'll be seeing it about six more times.

I've been missing you since February, but I'm still eternally disappointed in how all this has turned out.  You're not really a 10:30 (or...11:30 for those of you in real!America) kind of guy.  I just know they're gonna make you leave behind all the awesome stuff that made you awesome and dumb down your acerbic wit for the touchy, easily-offended masses.  Last night I watched some Late Night on youtube and wrapped myself in the deliciousness of you talking about how crappy your show is and some Walker, Texas Ranger lever.  God, I miss that.  No more dirty Year 2000 and I'm certain no more Triumph...at least not in any recognizable form.  :(

And what do you do to compensate for all of these losses?  You give me ANDY-FUCKIN'-RICHTER?!  SERIOUSLY?!  Remember when you out-grew that guy, like a decade ago?  Dude, he's a hanger-on.  MAKE HIM LET GO.  And give me Joel!  

I'd like to punch whatever idiot decided on this course of action.  Leave Jay alone--he was super in that time slot, and Conan isn't meant to be truly mainstream.  Jimmy Fallon's nice and all...but clearly, Tina Fey was the brains in that operation.

So, glad to have you back, sad to see your state.

My brother is stupid and most of the time I wish he would just move away and not talk to me anymore. I don't get people who are all wound up about providing their kid with a sibling. Just because they're related doesn't mean they like each other or share in those bound-by-family-ties duties. And one could be a lemon.

So anyway, here's a meme from love_n_lostabout fandoms. 

( Yea )

Btw, imjinnie you still owe me 5 tapes (48, 50, 54, 77, 79) so search under your bed or whatever and then we can do lunch again sometime.  Unless you're planning some diabolical scheme that involves holding random General Hospital tapes hostage? 

So, I thought maybe I should actually update my journal since I pay for it and stuff.  But whatever.  I would just like all of you to know that while I haven't updated my own journal, I have been keeping up with my flist.  So, feel special for being stalk worthy. 

Really, the only interesting thing I can think to post is this: In January I discovered that I'm afraid of submarines, and really, all manner of submerged things that don't belong there.  I went snorkeling and kinda panicked at Disney's fake, intentionally sunk submarine...in about 5 feet of water.  Now, whenever I see one, even on TV, I get chills and feel kinda queasy.  I'm not quite sure what that says about my psyche or about my desire to learn to scuba dive.  I'm thinking it's not good.

I've also been watching a lot of General Hospital lately.  But, old stuff, from at least 7 years ago.  All revolving around a 'ship that never really was (despite the impression my userpic may give).  Anybody else have a strange attachment (addiction?) to shows/books/movies that didn't live up to your expectations but you can't quite let go of?  Like you get all excited and hopeful and it feels like no time has passed and then...you realize that what you want is never going to happen and you're disappointed and angry all over again?  God, I HATE THAT. 

( If Mulder Only Knew... )

POLL TIME!
Poll #1309108 Who would you rather ravage?
Open to: All, detailed results viewable to: All, participants: 8

Whose news desk do you want to see the underside of?

 

I thought McCain's concession speech was super classy.  I wish he had conducted himself that way--the way I truly believe him to be as a human being and a man--throughout the campaign instead of obviously listening to hard-core Republican strategists.  I think if he had just been himself instead of pandering to a far-right conservative Republican base that he doesn't truly represent anyway (and didn't really turn out to vote for him), the election would've been much closer.  Instead, he just gave a voice to all the angry, hateful, polarizing views of the Crazy!Republicans (not that all, or most, Republicans are crazy; I'm specifically addressing the ones who want to believe Obama is a Muslim and that by definition is a bad thing, etc.) when I know he doesn't share their views or their fervor.

As it is, I'm pretty stoked.  I think it's impossible for Obama to live up to all the promises he has made, but really, when's that NOT true for a president-elect?  Or any elected official for that matter?  Honestly, I just hope this makes some strides to help heal all the wounds of this country and helps to restore a better place in the world for us.  And how...American to see a bunch of African-American Obamas on that stage with a bunch of blonde haired, blue eyed, European-American Bidens.  I loved it.

And speaking of the world, my international flisters seem to be at least as excited by Obama's election as my fellow citizens.  I tried to comment last night on several posts, but I couldn't really think of what to say.  I guess I'm just insanely curious about what this really means to the rest of the world--why does every other country on the planet seem to be so fervently behind Obama?  Is it about what it means for America and so we again become that 'beacon of light' and example for the rest of the world--that it gives hope to the rest of the world?  Is it about what it means to your country specifically?  What are your expectations of him and of America?  And on a related note, of the responsibilities the rest of world places on America (and we place on ourselves), do you think they result from America's broad power and how we've inserted ourselves into other countries and the pull we have the world over, or do you think that other countries have an equal part in creating these expectations and responsibilities by importing our culture, our way of life and by accepting our help?  Really, I guess I just want to know why this election means so much, what exactly it does mean, and why everybody seems (and probably is) so entitled to their opinion about it?  Weigh in, invite your friends to drop by, whatever...I'm just extremely curious.

So I went to the Hillary Clinton rally here last Friday.  It was pretty interesting.  She has fabulous hair...I wondered a lot about how long it takes to do it in the morning when she's working all those long hours on the campaign.  It seemed like a lot of work.  /shallow

Then, Obama was here on Saturday and I really wanted to go, but my stupid sinus infection was really bad, so I didn't.   Then I saw the picture of the 100,000 that did show up, and I was glad I didn't.  Yay! 

( I'm Controversial! )

How is giving tax cuts to the rich "capitalist, trickle-down economics," while giving them to the middle and lower classes is "socialist"?   

'Joe the Plumber' has said that Obama has a socialist view of taxes, and then followed it up by arguing that just because he makes more, he shouldn't have to pay more.  Call me crazy, but...equal distribution of wealth and responsibility (at least as far as taxes go)? Sounds a little socialist to me, Joe.  Why don't you just say what you really want: socialism for the rich, capitalism for the poor.  And really, I don't know why you care anyway since you already don't pay your taxes.  WTF-EVA.  I just think it's hilarious that McCain tried to use this guy as an example of 'joe-six-pack' without checking into his background.  The media dug up all this stuff about him--no plumbing license, owes back taxes--in a matter of about 18 hours, yet McCain said this guy talked to Obama on Sunday; his campaign couldn't have done a little research over the course of THREE DAYS?!  You'd think he would've learned after that whole vice presidential nominee thing.

Is anybody else ready for this damn election to be over?

So I was a little disappointed in the debate.  Sarah was a little too prepared and Joe was a little too concise, so there wasn't nearly as much hilarity as I had hoped.  But there was one moment that completely made my week. 

Joe Biden: ...But the notion that somehow because I'm a man I don't know what it's like to raise two kids alone--I know what it's like to have a child you're not sure is...*gets all choked up*... is gonna make it.  I understand.

Sarah Palin: *flipping through notes about what to do if he uses sexism against her or...CRIES*  ::pause:: John McCain is a maverick.

HILARIOUS.  I mean I feel bad about his wife and daughter and all, I just think it's fabulous that he ended up being more of a girl than she was so no one could play the bully card against him.  FABULOUS.

Ironically, it's during national stay-at-home week.  Here's hoping my sinus infection doesn't come back...

BWAHAHAHAHAHA! 

That was a really nice try to get the Hillary voters on your side, but frankly, entirely transparent.  You pick someone with less experience than Obama from a state that's not really that difficult to run.  If there's an invasion of moose, a salmon shortage, or we need to hunt a whale, I guess we'll be in good shape.  And seriously, anyone who has a baby (whether on purpose, accidentally, or through adoption, etc.) at 44, when she already has four kids, during her first term as governor has some definite judgment issues.  So, really, you want me to vote for you when if you keel over from a heart attack or Air Force One crashes a person with no experience and a new baby will be running the country?  Yeah, I think I'll pass on that.  But it was a good try.

Sincerely,
Me

I've decided I should write about something other than X-Files after I scrolled down and realized that about 19 of my last 20 posts have at least talked about it if it wasn't the only subject.  Make that 20 of my last 21.

I've been thinking a lot about what makes a life well-lived.  I'm starting to wonder how much of it is lost to The Things We Don't Say.  

I was on Facebook for the first time in like 6 weeks and on a whim started a chat with a guy I haven't talked to since graduation.  I think we may have just spent the last 2 hours flirting, but I'm not entirely sure.  Can you flirt over the finer points of word definitions?

I think my nephew finally hit his terrible twos.  Too bad it's only a year-and-a-half too late.  He has to argue about everything and pouts at the drop of a hat.  But he does say things are "hilarious"--like when his dad runs away from bees--which I think is hilarious.

I'm still contemplating my directionless future, and no clear direction seems to be emerging from doing so.  I've reading about Disney again lately, and it really made me want to move there--AGAIN.  Except I can't because my brother's an irresponsible jackass and the rest of my family is kinda worthless.  yay.

The DNC starts tomorrow, and I was thinking about going downtown to take pictures for practice.  Except I'm terribly unfamiliar with downtown and my camera is a little wussy for that sooo...I don't know about that.

The Nightmare Before Christmas comes out on DVD on Tuesday.  YAY!

So I saw IWTB for the 6th time last week before it went out of all the theaters that are less than 30 miles from my house.  I fell in love with it even more.  


In other news, my mom got another job inside the company, so I still have health insurance! YAY!  Ironically, it's the same job I was doing before they didn't have any budget, except she gets benefits and more money to do it since she's an employee and not a contractor.  See, if I had actually really TRIED to keep my job, then my mom would be unemployed and we would be poor.  However, I found a job posting for a chauffeur, but you have to be 25.  Damn you, laws! Like I'm a gonna be a better driver 6 months from now?!  Though, I did find another job posting for a copy editor-type job that I'm perfect for, but now I have to write a cover letter--the most horrible invention ever in the history of job hunting.  

Still 33 days til WDW, though. ::sigh::

So, I had coffee with bettyentel and I tell her I should meet her "friend" that only gets hit on by old people because we both apparently release old-people pheromones. Fast-forward to 8pm when I drive halfway across town to a book store to buy my hard-to-find magazine (for the X-Files article) and my hard-to-find book (because it was the inspiration for one of my favorite X-Files episodes). I get both in hand and then decide to look around because I just drove halfway across town. I'm looking at graphic design books when I hear:

"Excuse me, do you know where I can find the James Patterson books?"
Uh, UH OH. "Um, probably in the fiction section."
*awkward silence* "I like his stuff."
"Really? I've never read one of his books." *turns back to graphic design books.*
"I like them. They have romance and stuff." RED ALERT. RED ALERT. "What are you looking for?"
"Just looking."
"I don't see a boyfriend. Do you have boyfriend?"
"Nope."

Cut to the point of the story: he's 17. SEVENTEEN. I HATE YOU, FATES! I get it, OK?! I say only get hit on by old people, so you send jail-bait. HA-HA. Irony is hilarious, ok? I GOT IT. The really sad part is, he TOTALLY had more game than my sleazy neighbor who's twice his age.

I'm never going anywhere without my mom again. No one hits on me in front of my mom. They usually just stare and say things like "nice shirt" when it has things like Thumper on it. I'm okay with that. No awkward conversation. I really don't have to participate in that interaction at all. It's within my comfort zone. So, as bettyentel and  I have already discussed, THIS IS ALL HER FAULT.